yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
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It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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