I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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