I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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