well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
did you just send me my own nude
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize