Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Four minutes until I can fart!
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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