ya dads aren't the best wingmen
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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