We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
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I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Randomize
