I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
This toilet bowl is my home.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
