At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
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