I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
