I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
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it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
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These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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