Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
