You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
