I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
