Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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