You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize