Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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