yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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