Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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