Need sex. Gaining weight.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
