my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Randomize
