Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
