I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
This is classic penis vs brain.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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