You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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