In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
