how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize
