Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
