So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize