i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
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