i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
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