Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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