So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize