How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize