sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize
