What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
