So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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