is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
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