quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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