I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
