I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
