Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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