oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
