I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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