Whod you bang
Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
