Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Can you repeat that, but with context?
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