I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
