Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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