I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize