I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
