we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
